5.28.2005
Worship Kramdar
All Hail.
Posts forthcoming.
Posts forthcoming.
5.18.2005
Gosh, I'm just so tired of all these Star Wars...
"I wasn't aware there was a titular line in that movie."
And here I am, in line, waiting for Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith. Brian and I just finished an interview with the local news, talking about our love of all things nerdy. Although we probably came off as the more mature fans, the footage shown tonight will more likely be that of the annoying-as-fuck teenagers, one of whom pulled down his pants during the interview. That's entertainment!
So why the urgency in blogging all of this? None really. I've got another four hours to kill - might as well show some love to this oft-neglected site.
We got here around 4 p.m. - it's the usual bunch of misfits: Brian, Mitch, Alex, Fray, John and Troy. As of 8 p.m., there's a group of about 30 people waiting for the final installment, varying from interesting to annoying to those with a complete lack of social graces. This is my third time camping out for a Star Wars film, and the one constant thing that seems to resonate is the "cyber novel." H.P. Lovecrat fans unite!
Us? It's the usual heckling. Fray decided it'd be funny to call my cell phone in the middle of the interview with the ABC news douche.
The annoying high school kids who wouldn't shut up while we tried to watch Attack of the Clones... well, let's just say they shouldn't have left their nachos unattended while they hammed it up for the news.
And as I chow down on the remains of my last bite of chicken quesadilla, there's the God damn news man with a camera on me, chowing down and typing away. "I hope they don't have us eating Taco Bell on the news," Alex said.
Mitch attempted to hit on the "only two remotely attractive girls here," according to Troy.
"You guys here to see Star Wars?" he asked them.
"NO!" they said with scorning emphasis. Of course, that's what you get for trying to pick up chicks in a Star Wars line.
Some douchebag who got quoted in the Sun was inside with his custom-made dual sided lightsaber, according to John. Someone asked him if he made it himself, to which he replied "You see the Gainesville Sun today?" while donning a big shit-filled grin and pointing at himself.
"What was in the Gainesville Sun?" Mitch asked.
"Someone who thinks he's better than everyone else," John quipped.
Sitting here on a laptop, a man missing all of his front teeth donning a beat up leather jacket decided I was an approachable friend. "Man, my girlfriend was supposed to bring me food," he said as he watched me eat my Taco Bell.
This guy has a girlfriend? There's no hope for humanity.
"Oh well," he said. "I'm just gonna go get some MacDonald's."
Yeah buddy, that'll help your teeth grow back in.
We've got pictures, but I'm too lazy to upload here. Expect them on this space, along with more unwanted commentary, in a few days.
So if you're a Gainesville resident, put on the 11:00 news tonight. You might see my ugly mug yapping about Star Wars. And if not, you can always read the dumb shit I have to say here.
And here I am, in line, waiting for Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith. Brian and I just finished an interview with the local news, talking about our love of all things nerdy. Although we probably came off as the more mature fans, the footage shown tonight will more likely be that of the annoying-as-fuck teenagers, one of whom pulled down his pants during the interview. That's entertainment!
So why the urgency in blogging all of this? None really. I've got another four hours to kill - might as well show some love to this oft-neglected site.
We got here around 4 p.m. - it's the usual bunch of misfits: Brian, Mitch, Alex, Fray, John and Troy. As of 8 p.m., there's a group of about 30 people waiting for the final installment, varying from interesting to annoying to those with a complete lack of social graces. This is my third time camping out for a Star Wars film, and the one constant thing that seems to resonate is the "cyber novel." H.P. Lovecrat fans unite!
Us? It's the usual heckling. Fray decided it'd be funny to call my cell phone in the middle of the interview with the ABC news douche.
The annoying high school kids who wouldn't shut up while we tried to watch Attack of the Clones... well, let's just say they shouldn't have left their nachos unattended while they hammed it up for the news.
And as I chow down on the remains of my last bite of chicken quesadilla, there's the God damn news man with a camera on me, chowing down and typing away. "I hope they don't have us eating Taco Bell on the news," Alex said.
Mitch attempted to hit on the "only two remotely attractive girls here," according to Troy.
"You guys here to see Star Wars?" he asked them.
"NO!" they said with scorning emphasis. Of course, that's what you get for trying to pick up chicks in a Star Wars line.
Some douchebag who got quoted in the Sun was inside with his custom-made dual sided lightsaber, according to John. Someone asked him if he made it himself, to which he replied "You see the Gainesville Sun today?" while donning a big shit-filled grin and pointing at himself.
"What was in the Gainesville Sun?" Mitch asked.
"Someone who thinks he's better than everyone else," John quipped.
Sitting here on a laptop, a man missing all of his front teeth donning a beat up leather jacket decided I was an approachable friend. "Man, my girlfriend was supposed to bring me food," he said as he watched me eat my Taco Bell.
This guy has a girlfriend? There's no hope for humanity.
"Oh well," he said. "I'm just gonna go get some MacDonald's."
Yeah buddy, that'll help your teeth grow back in.
We've got pictures, but I'm too lazy to upload here. Expect them on this space, along with more unwanted commentary, in a few days.
So if you're a Gainesville resident, put on the 11:00 news tonight. You might see my ugly mug yapping about Star Wars. And if not, you can always read the dumb shit I have to say here.
5.09.2005
Death's design
An unnecessarily large number of matches in Halo 2 on Xbox Live will lead you into some interestingly morbid topics of discussion. Case in point earlier tonight:
Brian, having finished a matchup, handed my Xbox controller back to me, dripping with sweat. As I wiped off my palms on my pants in disgust, I remarked to Brian, "You know, you're gonna die of a heart attack. You're gonna do it to yourself, you're gonna stress yourself out, you're gonna die, and it's gonna suck."
And although I don't have any real proven soothsaying powers, Brian realized I spoke the truth and reluctantly agreed. If a match in Halo can produce that much sweat, imagine what a job will do to you.
"It'll probably happen at 42," Alex told Brian. "Yeah, that sounds like a good number."
Ah yes, Alex: our lovable-yet-clumsy-as-shit guest for the evening. Alex just finished up healing her face, which featured a scab on the forehead and nose and a black, swollen eye. You'd think someone rubbed sandpaper on her face and then smacked her with a sock full of oranges, but no, it was from an encounter with a ferocious two foot wave.
Besides, I was just joking with Brian. She had to go all serious on us and give us a specific age for him to croak. That made the whole thing a lot more depressing. She had her own death coming to her for that one.
"You're gonna die of something stupid," I told her. "Something really God damn stupid. You'll probably fall off of a building. And it'll happen really soon."
How did this conversation become so mean-spirited?
I then realized it wasn't fair that I had dished out the skinny on their demises without having my just desserts returned to me. I asked Brian for some input. After pondering for a bit, he came to an answer.
"You're going to end up in jail for killing someone in a crime of passion," he said. "Then someone will kill you when you end up in jail. But not before he rapes you."
Even in conjured up predictions of my demise, it's nice to see people like me wherever I go in life.
But it wasn't all depressing. I've always wanted to be convicted in a crime of passion. Plus, his story was much better than how it always ends in my nightmares: when I'm in prison and I get raped by Shaq.
Wait a minute...
Brian, having finished a matchup, handed my Xbox controller back to me, dripping with sweat. As I wiped off my palms on my pants in disgust, I remarked to Brian, "You know, you're gonna die of a heart attack. You're gonna do it to yourself, you're gonna stress yourself out, you're gonna die, and it's gonna suck."
And although I don't have any real proven soothsaying powers, Brian realized I spoke the truth and reluctantly agreed. If a match in Halo can produce that much sweat, imagine what a job will do to you.
"It'll probably happen at 42," Alex told Brian. "Yeah, that sounds like a good number."
Ah yes, Alex: our lovable-yet-clumsy-as-shit guest for the evening. Alex just finished up healing her face, which featured a scab on the forehead and nose and a black, swollen eye. You'd think someone rubbed sandpaper on her face and then smacked her with a sock full of oranges, but no, it was from an encounter with a ferocious two foot wave.
Besides, I was just joking with Brian. She had to go all serious on us and give us a specific age for him to croak. That made the whole thing a lot more depressing. She had her own death coming to her for that one.
"You're gonna die of something stupid," I told her. "Something really God damn stupid. You'll probably fall off of a building. And it'll happen really soon."
How did this conversation become so mean-spirited?
I then realized it wasn't fair that I had dished out the skinny on their demises without having my just desserts returned to me. I asked Brian for some input. After pondering for a bit, he came to an answer.
"You're going to end up in jail for killing someone in a crime of passion," he said. "Then someone will kill you when you end up in jail. But not before he rapes you."
Even in conjured up predictions of my demise, it's nice to see people like me wherever I go in life.
But it wasn't all depressing. I've always wanted to be convicted in a crime of passion. Plus, his story was much better than how it always ends in my nightmares: when I'm in prison and I get raped by Shaq.
Wait a minute...
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2003 - 2005 Reverend Hughes |
